Many couples underestimate just how different their lives will be with the addition of a child. With all the resources it takes to care for a newborn, your relationship may suffer. To help you keep the fire kindled, here are 10 ways to nurture your relationship after the
1. Schedule Time for Just the Two of You
Taking time to be a couple is essential. The best way to make sure you get this is to work it into your schedule, whether that means a date night or just a half hour of cuddling after your little one goes to sleep.
2. Don’t Forget Compliments
With so much stress, it’s easy to take your significant other for granted. Remember to thank your partner for doing chores or helping around the house. Even better, mention something completely unrelated to childcare to show you’re thinking of your significant other as a person rather than a parent.
3. Include Your Partner in Childcare
After you give birth, there are some things that only you can do, such as breastfeeding. But there’s lots of room for your partner to take an active role in nurturing your child. In fact, caregiving is essential to bonding, so it’s a great idea to have your significant other as involved as possible. Sharing the load can help you grow closer as you find your roles as new parents.
4. Make Adjustments for Intimacy
When you’ve got a new baby, sex sometimes falls to the bottom of your priority list. However, you and your partner can fulfill each other’s needs and avoid resentment by trying the following:
- Communicate: If you need something from your significant other for sex to be pleasurable, say so. Sex shouldn’t be a chore – it should be a way to reconnect with your partner and make each other feel good.
- Be Open to New Things: If you’re one of the many women who experiences pain months after childbirth, talk to your significant other about trying something different. This may mean new positions, opting for oral over intercourse, or using lubricant.
- Schedule Time for Physical Intimacy: This may seem unromantic, but if you leave sex for “when you have time,” you’ll never have it. Agree on a time that works for both of you and make it something to look forward to.
5. Acknowledge When You Have Bad Days
When you’re stressed, you may lash out at your partner without meaning to. If you find yourself stretched beyond your means, apologize and talk about what you’re feeling. This is especially important if you’re experiencing post-partum depression or other common mental health issues.
6. Make a Financial Plan Together
A new baby means new expenses, and fighting over finances is common for new parents. You can make sure you and your significant other are on the same page by creating a budget together. Let your partner know that you’re a team and avoid resentment about who is making or spending what.
7. Don’t Feel Bad About Asking for Help
You don’t have to do everything yourself, and more likely than not, your partner wants to be someone you can rely on. If the laundry is piling up or you don’t have anything planned for dinner, ask
8. Enjoy the Little Things
Not everything needs to be a big romantic gesture. Try to reach out to your partner in little ways, whether that means leaving notes, making a favorite food, or just saying, “I love you” as often as possible.
9. Figure Out Your Partner’s Love Language
You may think you’re communicating your love and gratitude, but if you and your partner have different love languages, your messages may go unheard. Figure out what makes your significant other feel loved and make an effort to express your feelings that way.
10. Find Things To Love About Your New Selves
You and your partner are going to grow and change now that you have a little human life to care for, and that’s a beautiful thing. Get to know these new sides of each other and fall in love all over again.
Putting in the effort to keep your relationship strong may seem impossible after a baby, but it’s vital to a happy family life. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, start off small and remember that the love you share with your significant other is what makes all the hard work worth it.